heartbreak therapy

everyone who knows me would agree that i sometimes am a teeny tiny bit romantic and passionate. well, i've experienced some heartbreak and subsequent aftershocks in the past few weeks and i've tried to quell my tendency to be over-dramatic.

i have been mildly successful. i have developed some coping mechanisms (sometimes i bring home therapeutic jargon from work...) and am still sorting out which ones are beneficial.

1. food/bumming around therapy

sometimes i wonder: is life sometimes like the movies because a) movie makers are good at mimicing the emotions and experiences of life, or b) we subconsciously mimic our lives after the movies?

you know in romantic comedies where, after a break-up, the protagonist drowns herself in sweets and stays locked in her room vegging? i totally did that. did i do it because it's a natural reaction or because my psyche tells me i must because (according to the movies) that's what everyone does? hmm.

either way, the truth is that food makes me feel better, okay? i ate 9 packets of fruit snacks in one night. oh, then it starts making me feel real gross. in addition, i figure i have a legitimate excuse to skip out on exercising. hey, my heart is broken! how should i expect it to speed up enough to pump my body when running?

deep down, i know it is ridiculous. but i really believe in feeling things deeply and fully, and somehow i have convinced myself that this is part of the experience. okay, i need to snap out of it. i will tomorrow after i finish off the sweedish fish i compulsively bought at the bookstore yesterday (i'm surprised they lasted this long!)

2. retail therapy

it's amazing what a cute new shirt from j. crew can do to heal the heartache. a 4-month late christmas present from my sister has never been better!

due to lack of sufficient funds, this coping mechanism is limited for the time being, but i really need to be careful when i get my paycheck. yesterday i window shopped in the mall by myself. wow, that's really lame.

3. sister therapy and sunshine therapy and art therapy

i spent last weekend in balmy arizona with my mom and three sisters. it was glorious. we had so much good food (see #1 above), soaked up the sun (vitamin D is good for the soul), visited a spectacular modern art exhibit in phoenix, and talked and talked and chatted and chatted and gabbed and gabbed and discussed and discussed. yes, lots of talking. all of it made me feel better and made my heart glow with happiness and love.

4. distraction therapy

thank goodness for our newly-instated roommate date night. every wednesday 5 of us brown house girls invite a boy to have a little adventure with us. first it was hot chocolate bar hopping, then cooking asian food in hotpots and eating sitting on the floor with chopsticks, then a visit to the springville art museum, then a picnic on the front lawn in the sunshine.

we've had a lot of fun and learned a lot and there are many more adventures to come. nothing like a hot date to mend the heart, right?

5. music therapy

sara introduced me to "forget about the boy," a charming ditty from the musical "thoroughly modern milly." and when she did, she belted along and even did some cute little tap dance moves. how can that not cure me instantly of any attachment or sadness?

the song has been replaying in my head for the last couple of weeks. sometimes i just have to sing the chorus out as loud as i can. i only know about four bars of the music and it's all the same four magic little words, but what a thrill.

6. semi-professional therapy

my roommate kerianne is seriously one of the coolest people on the planet, and she happens to have written a handy little book about how to survive a break-up. she supplies her wisdom to me in daily email installments. it is brilliant beyond brilliant. keri is graduating with a masters in social work in a couple days, and she's just so darn wise, so her advice is practically expert!

7. professional therapy

one of the perks of my job is that i get a little free therapy from some of the best therapists in the state from time to time. i am learning so much from the things my girls at work go through and it is actually quite amazing how i can relate it to my situation.

8. blogging therapy?

i dunno, we'll see if it works...


  1. char, you rock. you're my hero! p.s. you're typo might be kinda embarrassing...it's vitamin d that comes from the sun silly!

  2. char, i love this. we all need all that therapy.

  3. As usual, beautifully written and amazingly well-put emotions. You're gonna be fine..in fact great...in fact exuberant before long, thanks to therapy and one very strong spirit!

  4. I love this entry,
    And I love YOU!

  5. Char,
    Four words. "Listen To Your Heart"
    Watch this. Listen to words. And focus on the singer's hair.

  6. Charity! I love you! Can't wait to hang out with you. I love reading your blog.

  7. you are so awesome. i'm so sorry that you have to go through it, but so glad that you GET to go through it. its one of those life experiences you HAVE to have. but it still hurts.

    ncmo. its the only way.

  8. If we're posting youtube videos...

    When Cam is having a hard time, he watches videos like these:



  9. Charity. First of all, so sorry that you are going through a heartbreak. Second of all, all these therapies are spot on & you made me laugh all the way through the post.

  10. PS: My favorite part was "Nothing like a hot date to mend the heart."

  11. Even when your heart is broken you are darling, witty, and so much fun. I just love you, Char, and whoever that boy is, he really is worth forgetting! p.s. I love that song so much!