dripping with passion

everyone who’s had pretty much any interaction with me in the last two years knows that i only eat sweets on holidays. i tell everyone about this little rule because it keeps me accountable. yes, i am liberal with my holidays (flag day totally counts! and my goodness, vive la france on bastille day!) and i occasionally push the limit on what is considered a “sweet,” but for the most part, i’ve been non-holiday dessert free for over 750 days. and i’m pretty proud of myself. here’s the thing. i have had an actually very legitimate addiction to sugar in my lifetime. truly, i dare you to find someone with a bigger sweet tooth. i knew i needed some sort of framework to rein it in when i realized one evening, feeling quite ill sucking on a waxy sweedish fish, that i’d bought and single-handedly consumed an entire bag of candy every single day that week. so i decided – sweets only on holidays. and i’ve been empowered by this choice and have impressed myself with my devotion to it. and when t...

add “innosight institute team social chair” to my resume! the vote was unanimous at the office, and my first charge was planning a “summer social” for last friday. you better believe i made pretty invitations… the weather could not have been more gloriously perfect that friday on the coast. our ride along the craggy bluffs over the shimmering sea was enlivening and scenic. to be out of the office together under the azure sky felt heavenly! we had fun dinner conversation over lobster rolls and clam chowder overlooking the ocean. i love half moon bay and i am so grateful for such an awesome team of co-workers.

i thrive on change. i love moving to a new place and starting a new life. hence my seeming inability to stay put for more than a year…. there is just something so refreshing about starting over, about a clean slate, about an opportunity to be my best self in a new situation. and at this very point in my life, i’m craving change so profoundly. i’m feeling full of small living and in the truest need of the spark of something different. however, i’m resisting the impulse to pack up and jet out and externally transform my life, at least for a little while. i feel that i need to stick with where i am and what i am doing, that this is my time to learn about persevering and changing internally without changing externally. because isn’t it way more powerful to create a blank slate out of willpower rather than circumstance? to seize the opportunity to be better even when surroundings seem not very conducive? i think so. but for me, internal change is a lot harder than external change, and req...

i want a baby. more than anything, anything, anything. i want to be a mother. i want to give birth. i want to experience that first miraculous moment of skin-to-skin with a human that is half me and half someone i love with  deep, deep love. a human that grew inside me. one that i exerted the pinnacle of mortal physical effort to bring into the world. i want to be spit up on and change diapers and have hundreds of baby-cry-induced sleepless nights, and then i want to fall asleep with my child, my very own, snoozing on my chest. i want to look into the glossy eyes of a newborn to whom i personally gifted dna, whose veins have me running through them. i want to hold, cozy and tender and supple in my arms, a tiny body containing the spirit of one who has anticipated arrival to me as mother from the heavens. i want to struggle and ache and worry and hurt, and i want to be frustrated and exasperated and exhausted and harrowed – as a mother. i want a tattered body and frazzled mi...

the six of us girls were all studying in boston at the same time (wellesley, harvard, bu, tufts, wellesley, tufts). it was so fun to have a little reunion on saturday over mission tacos and bi-rite ice cream. krystal was in town from new york city and lauren just moved here from minneapolis! these are inspiring, incredible women. i cannot believe it has been nearly five years since i left boston. so much has happened. friendship is such a welcome constant.

brittany, a bay-area native, asked me to take her on a tour of san francisco. i of course obliged and told her to pick a few things she wanted to see. pacific heights mansions + moraga street stairs (a new place for me!) + golden gate park dahlia garden + baker beach + chinatown + secret rooftop + mission murals = fantastic choices. we met up with some other friends, and the morning fog gave way, i felt particularly picture-snappy and overexcited, and it was a marvelous day.                       my favourite bit was the moraga street stairs because it was new . i want to devote my next saturday in the city to places i’ve never been.

i spent all day last saturday in san francisco. as the fog rolled out in the late morning and the sun soaked the hills, i remembered how i felt when i first moved to the city by the bay . i just want to give the city a huge hug and kiss it on the cheek. {p.s. i just want to go on the record as recognizing that yes, i am fully aware that i am super overdramatic and excessively excitable. i’m chuckling at the exorbitance with you. but gosh, life’s shades are beautiful, and a deep belief in full living just throws my arms open and brings those tears to my eyes quite inadvertently.}  i felt really picture snappy on saturday – so many more photos to come!

yesterday the governor of north carolina came into the office for some meetings about innovation in education policy. with this distinguished guest and her posse visiting, it was quite the exciting day around our new digs. meeting governor bev perdue reminded me of my other brushes with political celebrities. in 2005, i interned at the office of senator orrin g. hatch. did you know that senator hatch is a songwriter? one of his songs is a hip-hop hanukkah song. keep in mind that he was born in 1934 and he’s a mormon. also, he looooves sweet potato fries. he ordered about a half a dozen platters of them at our intern dinner in the senate dining room. also, he has been a senator for thirty six years . thirty six. last also – i look like such a baby in these pictures – can’t believe my dc summer was seven years ago! during my summer gig working in the senate, my fellow interns and i made flashcards to learn the faces, names, parties and states of all 100 senators. that way, when we s...

…i spent my utah sunday at church, in milcreek canyon picnicking with dani and keri and other cool kids, at a random park in between salt lake and ogden with my sister and niece, in front of the temple sunset with nikki, and in the lobby of my parents’ building for a quick hug and hello before dashing to the airport. i sure packed places and people i adore into my quick utah weekend.