new yellow flowers

this morning i was looking for something in the archives of my blog and remembered this day – and how the mustard flowers were out in full brilliant bloom at a nature preserve near my house this time last year. i decided to take my sunday walk to that exact spot to see those cheery, sunny blossoms.

as i walked, i remembered all the times i’d strolled down that same path holding hands with a boy i loved. i walked past specific places along the path that held beautiful memories of the miracle of that relationship. i ached and ached, realizing that the picture that reminded me of the march mustard flower bloom was from a devastatingly romantic twilight, when i was dizzy with affection. i tried to walk through it all, with a determination for resilience.

but when i got to the spot where last year the yellow flowers were nearly overtaking the path, bright and hopeful and bursting, i saw only colorless tall weeds along the dusty trail. no yellow flowers this march. they’re gone. i turned around and cried on the way home.

then, i remembered the flowers i had in a vase on my nightstand/ dresser. i found those tulips on my doorstep monday after school, with an anonymous note. and i realized that there are still yellow flowers in my life – even if the illustrious, vivid ones from last year are gone.

let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of god, and for his arm to be revealed.
-d&c 123:17

{p.s. i’m pretty sure those flowers were sent by someone who reads this blog, along with a couple of other super kind acts of service. so – whoever you are, thank you.}