ten thoughts on a wednesday |37|

 
 

one.
after months of reflecting and working on my habitual screen time, i’ve come to a firm conclusion that i am addicted to my phone, full stop. realizing this is scary and i’m determined to get in control. here’s a couple of my action items for this week:
first, take a seven day fast from social media. our prophet recently challenged the youth of the church to do this, and i decided to join in. yesterday morning i deleted instagram from my phone (i had previously deleted facebook) and i’m excited to see what realizations and goodness come out of this practice. i am embarrassed to say that i had to build up some courage to delete instagram!
second, have a rule that every time i pick up my phone while i’m with my toddler, i have to tell him what i am doing with it. i came across this idea while listening to this podcast, and it’s such an awesome tip. doing this really helps me not only to connect with moses and help him learn about proper smartphone use, but it is also such a great accountability tool for me. i don’t really want to tell my almost-two-year-old: “now i’m just mindlessly scrolling through alluring images and comparing my life to other people’s…” :) 

two.
some days i think to myself: “oh yeah, i got this! i’m doing this mom-of-two-under-two thing like a total boss!” and then other days this mom-of-two-under-two thing completely kicks my butt. mostly, i genuinely love this wild chapter of life. gabriel has truly brought an added measure of sweet love and goodness to our home and family. ian and i are closer than ever, moses is in many ways rising to the occasion as a big brother, and i am being stretched in ways that are exciting to me. sometimes it’s so chaotic and sometimes i am sooo exhausted, but i’m trying my best to just enjoy this crazy adventure. 

 
^^ football class and sitting on the random horse statue that is in our garden, ha! ^^
 
^^ after one such motherhood-totally-kicked-by-butt days this past week, i didn’t leave the house until ian got home around 8:30pm. i went straight to our garden and was so refreshed seeing that the roses has started blooming in earnest! ^^

three.
moses and i both have had lots of fun with friends lately. every thursday morning we get together with a bunch of pals and do some simple learning activities, and then the moms chat while the kids play. it’s so great. we hosted this “toddler class” this past thursday and it was a party — usually only about half of the moms/kids can come but this time nearly everyone in the group showed up. i wish i would have taken a picture of our front room just packed with friends. i was so relieved that Gabriel slept through the entire thing, haha. many other days of the week we meet up with a few friends at a playground or museum or event. i’m really grateful for growing friendships for both me and mo. 

 
 

four.
gabriel is six weeks old. i can’t believe how time has flown and also how i can’t imagine what life was like before he was here. wix weeks is a significant milestone for most women postpartum - it is kind of universally accepted as the point at which the womb is re-adjusted and regular physical activities can resume. for us it also marked the end of regular visits from our wonderful midwives. our primary midwife, sarah, came over last week for a “discharge appointment” and we were all pretty sad that we won’t have her in our home any more (although we definitely plan to stay in touch forever!). sarah has been an angel in our lives and will always be a part of our family heart. ian and i are pretty big fans of hers, and gabriel owes her his life in some ways…but sarah is for sure most beloved to moses. sarah and moses just adore each other and have had lots of fun together over the past few months :)  

 

five.
the season of bursting roses, sumptuous flower boxes, and splash pad fun has arrived in london! i love summer in the city.

 
 
 
^^ at our first splash pad outing of the summer, mo discovered the fun of dipping his head in the fountains. he thought it was pretty hilarious! ^^
 
^^ and meanwhile, gabriel snoozed in the wrap and the roses of holland park delighted our senses. ^^

six.
i read this article recently after my sister-in-law shared it with the family, and i really love it. the author shows that "the very verse that has been used to marginalize women was really god’s own tribute to his daughters.” and so, “it is high time that we reclaimed and embraced god’s vision of women.” i think quite a bit about feminism in the context of my religion and this article was really enriching to that continuing thought. 

seven.
as i’ve mentioned here before, i have been planning to go back to school this fall for quite some time. i have been so, so excited about the education/career path that i had discovered and my school-loving mind was so looking forward to getting started. recently we learned that, despite being told otherwise last year, i do not qualify for the “home” fees for the program i had chosen to apply for. instead i was liable for the international student fees, which are more than twice as much, and ultimately prohibitively expensive. realizing this has been genuinely devastating for me. i am heartbroken that i cannot follow through with the plan i carefully crafted and have felt so, so good about over the past couple of years. i am learning from this experience and trying to stay positive, and i feel confident that i can find another (and perhaps better in the long run?) path for education so i can do the work i have become really passionate about. we will see how it all shakes out. 
sometimes things just don’t work out after you’ve invested a lot of energy and excitement in them, and that sucks. but i always chose to believe that something better in some way or another is available, if we keep our heads up and look for it!

 
 

eight.
yesterday one of my angel friends took care of moses for the morning so i could get some things done and focus on the baby. when it was nearly time for me to go pick mo up, i decided to walk to this friend’s house through notting hill. there were so many delightful scenes along the way, and it did me good to take them in. london may have many days with grey skies, but it is such a colourful city. 


^^ i swear i can’t walk by this place without snapping a photo! ^^
 
 
 
 

nine.
the other day i discovered a secret weapon for keeping a toddler entertained on a ten-hour transatlantic flight - face filters on instagram stories! moses was so excited about the different funny things the phone did to his cute face and his attention was kept for a long time, haha. we are flying to utah a month from today! we decided to take this flight three days before mo’s second birthday, so we wouldn’t have to pay for him (airlines require kids to have tickets/their own seat as soon as they are 24 months old)! yep, we are cheap like that… moses and ian are sitting in the back of the plane and gabriel and i are sitting at the bulkhead with the baby bassinet that attaches to the wall. it made sense to divide and conquer and i definitely got the easier end of the deal… we will see how it goes - there’s definitely a reason a seat is required from 2 years old - it’s tricky to keep moses on your lap for even five minutes these days! 

 
 

ten.
a football class for kids younger than two years old is admittedly pretty silly, haha. but we tried it out a couple of times before gabriel was born and it was just so cute and fun. moses had two more football classes this past week. sure, he’s not quite big enough to understand the concept of the game at all :) … but the activities the coaches do seem to really be helping him learn about following instructions and interacting well with other kids. at the end of his class last friday, mo got a medal, haha! he was at first quite perplexed and then totally delighted by it :) 

  
 

happy wednesday! life is beautiful!